Two are better than one

Dear reader,

What I am about to tell you, is nothing new, however, we often forget it. What I´m about to remind you, surely you have already experienced it in your own flesh, but maybe the routine has taken it away from you.

How long has it been since you´ve felt that there is someone close to you, someone whom you can turn to on your bad days?

How long has it been since you´ve felt that there is someone close to you, someone you can go and talk to for hours and share everything inside you.

Seriously, someone with your full trust, someone who needs only a moment to know that you are not ok. Someone you can be vulnerable with and show yourself as you are, someone you feel safe with, in peace.

Actually, as we grow, our friendships become more incidental and less intentional.

As we grow, we have more and more friends with whom we live our day to day, but at the same time, less friends with whom to share our same goals, ideals; less friends with whom to be yourself.

As we grow we acquire responsibilities, and people around us become our reality, and in part it is normal. For example, your friends at work, are your friends because you have things in common: work, perhaps the same profession, age, etc. When you were in college, your friends were those of your career, those of the theater club or with whom you shared the car to get to university. And further back, when you were in high school, your friends were those who were in your classroom, those of your soccer or volleyball team, with whom you shared certain interests.

It's not a bad thing and I'm sure that from there you have made unique friendships, however, I would like you to think about whether your friendships have been incidental (because of the conditions, the context, the moment) or intentional (because you want to be with them and because they want to be with you).

The answer is very simple, if the friendship you had with someone in high school was distanced in college, if you didn´t have many things in common and as time goes by your friendship is less personal, then it was incidental.

Moreover, if the friendship continued despite the fact that both of you chose different majors and universities, if it continued despite the distances and all the responsibilities, I would say that your friendship is intentional.

I want to make sure you got my point, having incidental relationships is not bad at all, however, in this letter I will focus on the intentional ones.

An intentional friendship is one that begins with: "wait... you too? I thought I was the only person in the world who thought that ... "

It then continues with a great dose of admiration to see the person and say: "I want that" ... "I do not know what it is, I do not know what he has, but I want it."

And it goes on with several episodes of beers or coffees, according to the preferences of each person, where they "get acquainted" with the most important experiences each one has been through. Where it doesn´t matter if it´s been a week of having met the person, you have the confidence to entrust the most intimate of you because you have recognized yourself in him/her.

Come on! I know you´ve been there. I know you know how amazing it is to have relationships like this, in which it is almost unbelievable, in which it is hard to believe that there is someone who understands you and who cares about you.

In this type friendships you are not other thing, but vulnerable. It is to give yourself to the other, to show him or her what you are made of: the good and the bad, and at the end know that you are in good hands.

Do you know what is the good thing about being vulnerable, about being weak, about showing yourself apparently broken before the other person?

That you can start to build, that you can start to repair all the wounds, that you can see the starting point to become better. These friendships are the ones that will take you to Heaven.

I would like to share two brief stories of close friendships. The first one is about Jessy, our friendship started being incidental, but then it changed.             

                           

We met because we had many things in common... we volunteered at the same group, and we shared the same friends. However, not long before we met, we saw in each other something special that caught our attention, something that would help us grow, we found such confidence where our friendship became a safe haven for each one.

We became "partners in crime" and even though she studies medicine, she has a boyfriend and we both live in opposite poles of the city, there is always a space for us. There is always a moment to meet, complain about the world, vent our sorrows, grasp strength and return to our realities.

Picture of Jessy and I defending the lives of the unborn

On the other hand, there´s the story of my friend Laura. You will not believe it, but God introduced us ... hahaha, seriously! We met by coincidence, at the pyramids of Teotihuacán when, if I remember correctly, I asked her to take a picture. We ended up talking a bit and exchanged our facebooks.

It turns out that she is from Bolivia and was traveling in Mexico. Although we did not talk for almost two years, one day she wrote to tell me that she would come to Mexico to see our Lady of Guadalupe. To make the long story short; we spent six days traveling and visiting new places, but it took us an hour to recognize ourselves in each other.

It is a difficult friendship to describe, we live in completely different realities: she is an architect and is already working ... I am still in college studying Education. Different countries, different schedules, but the same intention: strong desire to get to Heaven. Chatting with her is like taking a break from the world ... Where it does not matter what is happening, there is always something that reminds me of the true meaning of this life. Chatting with her reminds me of my greatest desires in life, reminds me of the most important thing: to live each moment and treasure it as unique. Our friendship has helped me grow deeper in my faith and that is something I´m so very grateful for.

I can´t find the words to describe you the joy that it gives me to have these people in my life. They are people who help me grow, who bring me closer to God and who, in my bad days, remind me that it is worth getting up once more.

On our way to holiness, we cannot get there by our own, we need those key people to guide us when we do not see clearly and in the same way, we are called to be that light for them when they are not at their best.

In this type of friendships, it is impossible to keep record of everything given or received… there is such generosity that the more you give, the more you receive. As the book of Ecclesiastes says (4, 9-10): " Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. "

If either of them falls down ... if someone fails, if someone sins, the other will be there to lift him up, and help him move forward.

This is how friends are, a safe haven!

Think of those key people in your life, if they are now away from you, do not waste any more time and rebuild that friendship...

Always in my prayers,

P.S. I leave you a link with a great video on this subject, it's really worth watching it. Https://www.youtube.com/watch? V = epwHr-w-3a8

Alison Gonzalez